Wednesday, October 11, 2006

What I've Weighed

There are many numbers it is unwise to share with others. Numbers that others could use to steal your identity and make your life miserable. These include your social security number, your birthdate, your address, even your credit card number. These are often referred to as personal identification numbers.

Today I’d like to share some of my own personal identification numbers. These numbers won’t allow anyone to steal my identity. They may even cause a few people to be grateful they can’t swap identities with me. No one else has the same numbers that I have, and yet sharing them won’t make my life miserable. Uncomfortable, maybe. But not miserable.

So here goes. This is a list of what I’ve weighed.

Birth: 6 lbs. 7 oz. Probably the last time someone calculated my weight in ounces.

5th grade: 85 lbs. Not sure why this number stuck in my mind, but there you have it.

7th grade: 120 lbs. Our gym teacher took our weight and height. I was 5' 5". Still am.

9th grade: 118 lbs. This was after my first knee surgery. Not a healthy look.

10th grade: 128 lbs. Looking back, I should have been happy at this weight. Instead I remember standing in front of the bedroom mirror and wishing my thighs didn’t touch when standing with my feet together. Gag!

11th grade: 148 lbs. Went to Japan for two months before school started and gained 20 lbs.

12th grade: 130 lbs. Lost the weight I’d gained in Japan.

College: 140 to 148 lbs. My weight fluctuated, but I exercised a lot and felt healthy.

Wedding Day: 148 lbs. Why does every woman remember what she weighed on her wedding day? (20 yrs. old)

1st child: 194 lbs. at pre-delivery. (21 yrs. old)

2 weeks later: 168 lbs. I remember being hopeful that the remaining pounds would melt away.

22 yrs. old 178 lbs. Can’t seem to lose weight. It keeps finding me.

2nd child: 204 lbs. pre-delivery. An all-time record, but I only gained 24 lbs. with her pregnancy.

25 yrs. old: 182 lbs. Exercise and diet won’t budge the weight.

3rd child: 172 lbs. Actually weigh less than before I became pregnant. Wow!

27 - 30 yrs. 180 to 185 lbs. My weight stabilizes. Won’t come off, but at least I’m not gaining.

Jan. 2003: 204 lbs. I spoke too soon. Gained twenty pounds in just over a month. This is what I weighed before delivering my second child, and I’m NOT pregnant! Body does crazy things – goes through peri-menopause at 31 yrs. old. Weight stays despite persistent efforts.

Highest: 208 lbs. Can’t say exactly when I weighed this, but I did. And it lasted for a couple months.

Feb. 2006: 204 lbs. Joined Weight Watchers. I guess I finally decided that spending money on weight loss efforts wouldn’t be a waste – that I was worth it.

Oct. 2006: 168 lbs.

I’ve lost 35 lbs. since joining Weight Watchers. I give most of the credit to the program, but also feel that I’ve finally got a handle on my health problems. My doctor and I realized that my endocrine system had multiple failures. Medication has helped tremendously.

So there you have it. A history of my weight. Not pretty. Not exciting (at least not until this year). I’d also be remiss if I didn’t mention that depression also affects my weight. When I’m low, I crave carbohydrates. Looking back I can see that prior to realizing I had depression, I was self-medicating with food as a way to try to feel better.

Even though I’ve slimmed down, I’m careful not to look at pictures of myself from years back in a critical or condemning way. I am the same person now that I was then. I’ve learned a few life lesson, but I’m not "better" per se. Just different. And frankly, different feels good!

No comments: